Last week, I received my handicapped tag in the mail. Very bittersweet- on one hand, I can now go shopping (MAYBE?). On the other, I had to look at my condition as it lay right in my hand. My doctor had approved me for a handicapped tag. At 43 years old. My heart broke. How did this happen? I mean, I asked for it- I wanted it, I want to be able to go to the store and other places with my kids and actually make it in the door and through the store. So we eliminated the problem of getting into the store, now I just have to get through it. But to actually hold my status in my hand- it was more than I could bear. However- I used it for church this morning and could see the benefit! After cleaning out one of my small raised garden beds yesterday (and afterward coming inside and sleeping for two hours!), I was extremely sore. Heck, I’m still sore, probably getting sorer. If that’s a word. But since I was able to park in the handicapped spot at church, I had no problem getting in and sitting down, and usually I’m in massive pain just walking through church. I may get over the heartbreak of handicapped tag, just saying.
The other thing I’m dealing with -primary on my mind- is filing for disability. I am going through the process as we speak, and I should have an answer in a month or two. I had my medical evaluation over a week ago, and I have my mental evaluation this week. I would be so happy to have disability awarded. It would probably be another kick in the teeth initially, but it is sure needed. I have trouble even getting through an hour of work. The exhaustion is more than I can take sometimes. I’m also tired of trying to come up with ways to make money- things to sell, etc. People who are sick should not have to deal with things such as this. But I cannot sit by and let my husband shoulder it all. If it’s saving money somehow or making money somehow, my brain is all about it. I don’t want him to worry. And my medical status brings quite a few bills our way- it’s just the nature of chronic illness.
Couple of good websites I found:
http://www.ratracerebellion.com- if you want to find something from home full time or even just part time to add to your income.
http://www.laurengreutman.com – Kinda Dave Ramsey-ish, budgeting and financial help, menu ideas, freezer meal planning